On Friday I had an interview. The interview required a long drive to a new place and area. So in the days leading up to it, waking up of a morning and going to bed of an evening meant my anxious self was present. That low feeling was creeping in too meaning bed time was a bit of a low time. Thankfully my sleeping wasn't affected too much, not like it used to be in the dark days of the deep black. It did make me wonder though. Not if it was returning but if the high anxiety happens too often and for too long would that be storing up depression credit to be spent later on down the line of my life?
On the plus side I did manage to get up and out of bed and get to travel up to a new area and try it whilst it snowed quite heavily as well. I found the area, did the task and drove back.
All in all a successful day and one that, years ago, would have been a struggle. And had I failed it the following days would have been a bigger struggle, due to me duffing myself up with my usual, you failed it all again. As is/was usual with me. I have progressed and being nervous of new stuff is always going to happen. But when I complete it I feel so much better, so much more like I've grown a slightly thicker skin that can withstand similar in future.
This is what I need to remember. Otherwise I find myself slipping back to the old ways. And that would not be good.